Tuesday 9 February 2010

Simpel Session 10

Just got back from Simpel Session 10 in Estonia, and dispite the fact I couldn't get a press pass and only took like 3 riding pictures, I had the time of my life.
From a party every night to basically only not drinking when you are sleeping, the last 5 days with some of the best guys ever couldn't have been much better.
I'm now going to explain why it was so fun, so if you can't be bothered to read or just plain don't care, scroll down to the 9 pictures I chose out of the 150 I took to sum up the Estonia experience.

Ok, so we wake up at 4am Wednesday morning, for a horrible tired, cold drive to Stansted airport, where as soon as we get to the airport parking we are already laughing our heads off to Staffy stacking it on the ice and ending up on his back like a helpless tortoise....when we get to the airport, the Southampton boys are there to meet us, so we go chill in Burger King for a bit until we can check in and get on our flight.
By the time we get on the plane everyone is pretty stoked, despite the early morning wake up and not really sitting anywhere near each other.
When we land, it's basically as could as england, just with about 2 foot more snow, so first things first, get our bags, which already turned into a calamity when people are putting the bags you just took off back onto the carousel, so once we finally get out the airport, there is 10 of us with suitcases and backpacks looking for some kind of transport to our hostel, which much to our surprise was immediately offered to us by some mini van driver with 8 seats.....but he insisted it was fine to cram us all in. So on a unsafe and experienced drive to our hostel we finally get there and check in, start unpacking, then take a hour journey to the super market to get booze, which we soon found out it was only about 10 mins away, but Sparrow took us the most convoluted way ever.
So we get food, essential and alcohol and start drinking, 1st game of 4 kings gets underway, teaching the Southampton boys how to play a drinking game they will never forget, but never will want to remember. After a couple of games we decide to go out on the streets and head to a couple of pubs, even though we were the only UK lot in Estonia at this point. We head to Hell's Hunt, where we find a very moody bitch behind the bar. Few more pints down us and we end up trying to get into a strip club opposite our hostel, which was quite obviously shut, and from there on, I don't remember much more of the night.

Second day, well other than the battle for the good shower so we are not left with the 'leaky nipple' shower as Bevell quite promptly named it, there isn't much to talk about, so instead of describing every second of each day, I'll skip to the evenings, unless there was an eventful part during the day.
That evening we managed to find a really cheap place that did a Steak and chips with a pint and a shot for a very reasonable price, so we headed there for dinner, we then again went back to the hostel and started our night with 4 kings, pretty much like every night, but this time with some cheap ass 80% Vodka, which was far from suitable to drink straight......so we drunk it straight. We then headed to the bar with no name to meet Tommy Bruza, Parky, Miller and the essex lot, where we again drunk a fair few pints, and Bevell took part in some competition that I really didn't understand due to the amount of alcohol I had consumed. There was some gaps in that night I have to admit, but somehow I got the message we were leaving at one point when we weren't, so I got lost in the freezing weather on the streets of Estonia, which was far from perfect, but soon enough I found the hostel and just had to wait for everyone to come back so I could get in, which was actually not that long, well it didn't seem that long anyway. The night didn't end there either, there was a few strays from the bar that got picked up on the way home, so they came to our room, we got some tunes on and carried on drinking, at that point Rice realised we were breaking every rule that the hostel had up on the wall, which is always a brilliant goal to hit. Other than talking, chilling and drinking, not much more went on that night, other than Gould getting the nickname 'Heartbreaker'. I'm not gonna go on about the stupid amount of girls Carlos got so that should save a couple thousand words.

Day 3, Friday, Started off quite the same, except this time, I was hanging, the 80% Vodka did not agree with me at all. Today we headed to the Saku Stadium where the event was being held, we got our tickets, watched a bit of practice, then decided to go back and drink. This is where Drift King or 'DK' as he soon got the name, when he picked us up in a rear wheel drive minibus, he soon became our taxi driver for the whole trip, and he got a fair few kroons tip, especially when he went basically sideways into a massive mound of snow and ripped his mud flap off, and when he mounted the curb so we were close to the front door, he was a true legend.
Anyway, this led to the Friday night party, which in my opinion was the best, despite re-rolling my ankle again and not being able to walk back and having to get a taxi and nearly getting stitched up by the stupid taxi guy.
This night again consisted of 4 kings before we went out, then a bit of singing Fresh Prince on the way with some random Latvian beat boxer guy joining in.
The club was packed, and the ratio of men to fit girls is ridiculously good, almost every girl you see is gorgeous, even the girls you think must only be about 15, it makes you feel like a right pedo.
After a night full of crazy dancing, mental moshing, getting up on stage, getting covered in red bull and fucking my ankle again, we got back to the hostel and in bed by 4am, which was fairly early for us, well I say us, Chunky was usually in bed by 11pm.....only to wake everyone up at 10am, not cool.

Saturday, the 4th day, again, not much happened day wise, other than the qualifiers, which were pretty immense actually, so we start drinking again, which seemed to be the theme for this trip. Then obviously the trip to and from the stadium from DK.
That night was the Club Hollywood party, which was much closer, which was good, and despite everyone telling me last year it was the best party, it ended up only me, Rice and Sparrow going there, while everyone else stayed at the bar with no name.
But we soon met some more English people in the que, who were a treat, and phrases like 'This is Bury', 'Man, I hope this is San As Tits' and 'Balls out the bath on this one' soon came about. After about 2 hours in the freezing cold of queuing we finally got in, then found James Bruza, who was so fucked and started to piss over the balcony onto Ginge and then filled up a pint glass and threw that over everyone downstairs too, with surprised faces from Fred Murray, Ben Hennon, me and Chunky, James then stumbles to the bar to get another drink. Just walking around and talking to people like Dan Lacey and Morgan Wade was weird, it feels so gay, but it almost puts you star-struck hahaha, anyway that ain't anything compared to talking to Mike King from www.ffwdbmx.com and talking to the likes of Ross Penny....right?.....
This then led to about the time Chunky fell over, fucked his knee, and left without telling anyone to go back and go to bed, even though I left about 2 hours later and find out he only got in 5 mins before me, but that's a different story.
We then had a little dance, got dancing on the podium, had a couple more drinks, then at about 4 I decided to go back, but the party didn't stop there, oh no. When I got back to the hostel I found out half the lot who went to the bar with no name were still out and only half came back, so I sat and chilled with Bevell and Dave, who were with some of the Latvian girls from down the hall, who we soon came to the conclusion, they were alcoholics. Not that much later everyone else came back, so we got the beers out, and decided to stay up a bit longer, this soon ended up in Staffy trying to strip Gould and Miller coming in and face fucking Goulds ear, all of which I have videos of and I will put up on youtube soon. This is also the night 'NICE TROUSERS' became a catchphrase, but I don't think I can really explain that.....

Day 5, Sunday, the last day with a party. This was a day to remember, the finals, crazy shit going on, but I'm sure if you search Simpel Session 10 on google or some place you'll be able to watch that for yourself.
That night started off different, this was the only night without 4 kings, we just sat in the room finishing all the left over alcohol and adding it to the beer tower. This soon ended up in us throwing absolutely everything around, Staffy breaking Gould's bed attempting a high jump, Miller not being able to have babies, and some quite bad injuries. But again, you need videos of them, so check out youtube for that shit.
The last party was just as good as all the others, in fact all the parties were good, it makes Basingstoke look like such a shit scene it's unbelievable. This party consisted of cheap vodka, Bevell slashing open his hand, not seeing straight, Parky jumping of the balcony, just basically everyone realising it was the last party so getting totally shit-faced.
Once we got back to the hostel, surprise surprise, Chunky was in bed, and me, Gould and Rice stayed up for everyone else to come back from the bar with no name, as everyone went there again, not sure what went on other than the parties, as we did split up a bit while we were out and about.

This leads me to the final day, day 6, Monday....
Well other than waking up early, everyone being stupidly tired, getting out the hostel before the manager could look at our room, James Bruza losing his passport and not being able to fly and me losing money playing some stupid gambling game, theres really not much to say other than, it may have sucked to be going home, and we may have all been incredibly tired, but we could all agree we had a brilliant time, so many catchphrases and times to look back on and mistakes to learn from, such as don't let your friends turn your chocopic to chocodick or even though it's tempting to write 'Lychpit Masive' or 'Basingstoke Massive' on expensive cars like BMW's and Merc's, always check to see if the owner of the Bentley you are writing on isn't right behind you when you're doing it....

All in all, it was a fucking awesome time, and I would do anything to go right back now and do it all again, I can't wait for next year. And hopefully next year we will live on something that isn't cheese and crisp sandwiches.

Now here are a couple of photo's that I promised you up the top.

Peace out


On Our Way.....


Streets of Tallinn


Massive Icicle


Tallinn


Mark Webb - 360 Table


Chunky get's the 4th king


Beer Tower From 4 nights of 4 kings before we went out, complete with 80% vodka


Going Home


Flying Sucks



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